Saturday, December 11, 2004
November 2004 Avenal Trip
My second Avenal expedition (November 10 and 11) was an amazing experience. As we arrived and were getting my paperwork in order (always a challenge),we heard that all the water to the prison had been shut off, the holding tank was empty, and porta potties were on the way. We journeyed forth and at the first yard the staff toilet was overflowing into the chapel. The men quickly got to work with squeegees and prevented any damage, but we bailed (figuratively speaking). There was no going against that flow, and moved on without having that class. The smell was awful as we traveled around parts of the prison.
The second yard has a group of men with a sincere interest in both QiGong and Buddhist meditation who had been practicing the six moves I taught in June. We were joined by a good number of new comers. We reviewed and taught 4 new moves. The concept of a self-initiating practice group has taken hold on this yard (Yard 1) with regularly scheduled chapel time for both sitting and moving meditation. My prayers are that each yard will find its own leadership and the “way will open” for group as well as individual practice of the movements I come to teach every other month.
Walking into Yard 3 I was surprised to see Milton (aka Spider) who I had not seen for perhaps 3 years. Milton was a regular during my first years at Folsom and moves beautifully. He had seen the announcement of my coming and made sure he arrived before I did. Oh it was good to see him! It was easy to encourage him to help with the testimonial portion of our class, and we demonstrated the full Tai Chi Chih set together. Slipping into the chi flow melted away the years since we had last practiced together.
The Catholic Chaplain Ned Quigley and I called it a day, and went out to a dinner full of spiritual discussions about our prison callings. He plans on retiring this spring and we hope to get the moving meditation program well enough established so that it will continue easily when a new Chaplain arrives.
On Thursday I taught in three yards while the Chaplain worked on his own projects. Each yard had one or two men who returned from last June’s classes, but the majority of men were new so I started at the beginning. On Yard 5, the man who had made the beautiful alarm case that I have worn on my hip for years surprised me. I had not seen him for at least 4 years. He explained that he had been locked down for a year and a half at Folsom (with all the Northern Hispanics) and then was transferred to Avenal. This teaches me that I just can’t judge why men don’t return to class as lack of interest, so many times the reasons they don’t come are out of their control. His testimonial to the other students was powerful.
On my final yard I was able to see Greg C. again, who had originally encouraged Chaplain Quigley to bring me down and had been my right hand man at Folsom for years until he was transferred suddenly to Avenal. Last winter I had been disillusioned because of the circumstances surrounding his transfer. What had appeared at first glance to be a door closing ended up being 6 doors opening. Never doubt what one sincere man can do imprisoned. Greg was able to help develop and sustain a very active Contemplative program at Folsom Prison and initiate programs at Avenal Prison. He is out free now (early Dec) and let us all send prayers of gratitude for the good work he was able to do and spiritual support for his reentry into society.
Officially each yard in the prison was on lock down because of the water problems. Yet way opened and on each yard a guard agreed that letting 20 or so men out for a meditation class would be all right.
My visit was there right after the election and there was a palpable depression around many of the men that I don’t normally sense. For the most part, the men who come to my classes are resilient men who find a way to make the most of their time while inside. The sudden shift in the polls and election defeat of the Three Strikes Proposition, which would have meant freedom for quite of few of my students, had hit them hard. Freedom is so illusive and so precious.
Typically we had time for questions and discussion of the principles. On one yard we discussed listening to our bodies and the chi. The man who brought up the subject had observed, “I didn’t know I could feel so much happening in my body.” Another time the discussion went to “losing the edges of oneself and feeling a part of some flow that was much larger.” One Muslim man, full of the peace of his Ramadan fasting and prayers, was discovering spiritual messages in each of the TCC movements and a new understanding to his traditional pray moves. Perhaps because of the water problem, I seemed to find myself speaking about the Taoist philosophy of the watercourse way…yield and overcome…the soft flow wearing the hard rocks…seeking the path of least resistance ... tributaries joining together to make a powerful stream…
I look forward to returning in January of 2005. Please join my prayers that internal leadership arises and practice groups form to nurture the practice inside.
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June 2004 Avenal Report
My trip into Avenal Prison last Wednesday and Thursday was a powerful experience for myself, the Chaplain and about 150 men who came to the 6 classes. Each class, three on Wednesday, and three on Thursday, got better and better. Even in the last class which was elbow to elbow we were all able to rest in the chi and find the flow.
I taught 6 moves, 2 for each weight shift...Rocking Motion, Bass Drum, Carry the Ball (modified without stepping), Push Pull, Light at the Temples and Passing Clouds (simplified). We learned the 6 moves after a experience of finding our central core to discuss alignment, a little exercise to understand the principles of soft knees, and a standing meditation to set our intentions and the chi field. Then while they sat I did a demo of all 20 Tai Chi Chih (the form that was approved for Folsom Prison) moves while discussing principles and answering questions. Rested and inspired, they were back up on their feet and experiencing another practice of the 6 moves with less talk and an firm expectation of moving in synchronized manor. We finished with more standing meditation. Everyone got it. Most of the classes ended in a closing circle doing push pull, with their loved ones, then the institution, then the world in the center. Men from all (and no) faith traditions were present.
The expectation is that I will be invited back by the Chaplain if there is reason for me to come, i.e. they have been practicing and are ready to learn more movements. I expect to go back in in August and November. A difficult format, but yet so much better than nothing. It's a 225 mile trip 4 hour drive.
Each of the 6 yards is a prison all of its own and there is no movement of the men between yards. So it was like going to six different prisons. On most of the yards I was delighted to encounter several men who had attended my classes at Folsom. They will be a big help getting the practice groups going.
The Catholic Chaplain who sponsored my visit, practiced with the men each class and was delighted to move on with the chi (life-force energy) rather than effort. He recently sponsored Mike Kelly who has been instrumental in getting Centering Prayer groups started in No. Ca. prisons so the men have been given two significant meditative practices to help them find the peace with that will sustain their healing within a very difficult environment. Several yards already had Buddhist groups with established meditation practices.
As for myself, I was truly amazed at the ease and flow of my presentations, the words came, the movements taught themselves, the questions arose that needed to be answered. I was easily able to be the vehicle of a compassionate presence that I prayed to be. Thank you to each of you that supported my journey with your prayers. I felt your love flowing through me and so did the men.
Please continue to hold these men in your prayers as they now must face the personal work of developing a practice where ridicule and barriers are common and serene surrounding are absent. The only place of beauty they have to look upon is the sky.
Chifully, Judy Tretheway
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